Defining love is very difficult, especially because it is a faculty of the human being that is historical, that is, it grows, develops and matures over time and with the maturity acquired by the person in question. Each one loves as they have learned from life, have lived their lives and have been challenged to love and be loved. In the first stages love is a pure desire to have the other, to be flattered by the other, to be pleased with the other. We love those who distract us from ourselves, those who "make us happy" because they take us out of ourselves into a magical world in which emotions are intense. Desire is on the surface and often fills this intense and passionate love with anxiety. But that it easily collapses before the difficulties of life, before disappointment, before jealousy, the disappointments suffered and suffered by the pedestrian presence of the other as it becomes daily.
At first love is raptured and seems like a conglomerate of emotions that put us “outside of ourselves” in an alienation that makes us blind to what we choose and do. Then comes the denial and soon after we have a series of commitments such as “to continue for life, create children and maintain the economy.” Love can suffer the onslaught of the ordinary, of the defects of the other, of its unexpected transformation from king or queen to toad or cinderella. So we are in a complacent stage in which we hope to be flattered and make us happy and that is what we call loving, a certainly selfish love that should not be called love. Love exist in different from,some of which are:
1) Eros: Love of the body
Eros was the Greek God of love and sexual desire. He was shooting golden arrows into the hearts of both mortals and immortals without warning. The Greeks feared that kind of love the most because it was dangerous and could get them into the most trouble. Eros is defined as divine beauty or lust. Eros is mainly based on sexual attraction and it is where the term “erotica” came from.
Example of Eros love: A young couple that meets and immediately feels attracted, and lustful, towards one another.
2) Philia: Love of the mind
Also know as brotherly love, Philia represents the sincere and platonic love. The kind of love you have for your brother or a really good friend. It was more valuable and more cherished than Eros. Philia exists when people share the same values and dispositions with someone and the feelings are reciprocated.
Example of Philia love: Two friends talk about how deeply they understand each other, and how that security and openness causes them to feel comfortable and taken care of.
3) Ludus: Playful love
Ludus is the flirtatious and teasing kind of love, the love mostly accompanied by dancing or laughter. It’s the child-like and fun kind of love. If you think about it; this generation loves Ludus more than anything else.
Example of Ludus love: Modern love at its finest, Ludus love is best described by thinking of two people who just want to have fun together, with little need for security or roots.
4) Pragma: Longstanding love
The everlasting love between a married couple which develops over a long period of time. Pragma was the highest form of love; the true commitment that comes from understanding, compromise and tolerance. It is pragmatic this is why it is referred to as “standing in love” rather than “falling in love” because it grows over time and requires profound understanding between lovers who have been together for many years.
Example of Pragma love: Think about your grandparents, and how they have endured so much, but have always chosen each other.
5) Agape: Love of the soul
Agape love is selfless love, the love for humanity. It is the closest to unconditional love. The love you give without expecting anything in return reflected in all charitable acts. It is the compassionate love that makes us sympathize with, help and connect to people we don’t know. The world needs more Agape love.
Example of Agape love: The person in your life that is always giving to others, and needing nothing in return. This is the way they show their love, and this is the way they are energized through love. By giving all that they have, and all that they are, to those around them, they find beauty in life.
6) Philautia: Love of the self
The ancient Greeks divided Philautia into two kinds: There is one that is pure selfish and seeks pleasure, fame, and wealth often leading to narcissism and there is another healthy kind of love we give ourselves. Philautia is essential for any relationship, we can only love others if we truly love ourselves and we can only care for others if we truly care for ourselves.
Example of Philautia love: Selfish Philautia love is the kind of love that takes and does not give back in return — this is someone who only uses others to excel in life. Think about the social climbers of the world. On the other hand, the positive kind of Philautia can be seen in a couple that is a union, not a melting pot. They both do their own things, but they come together and support each others own growth.
7) Storge: Love of the child
Storge is the love parents naturally feel for their children. It’s based on natural feelings and effortless love. Storge is the love that knows forgiveness, acceptance and sacrifice. It is the one that makes you feel secure, comfortable and safe.
Example of Storge love: Think about the kind of love your mother gives you, or your very best friend. It is rooted in friendship, and understanding, but there is also a deep emotional connection there.
Unconditional love as its name implies does not set conditions for loving and allowing oneself to be loved, but is available even up to the sacrifice of oneself. It does not seek to force the other to be in one way or another, but finds a way to know the loved one more in order to spend time, energy, joys, attentions according to your preferences and needs. It is about deciding to invest in the other as the most important thing for you and to whom you are determined to dedicate your best qualities. It is knowing how to listen, it is giving in, it is receiving what you feel, it is being careful not to hurt. It is protecting and nurturing the heart of that person to whom we dedicate life. Unconditional love in the couple is something that is conquered with the time of being together, with facing difficulties, with coexistence and tolerance, with subjection and meekness. Loving is exercising the best qualities that we have as people and putting them at the service of another person, to whom we lavish our care, our time and share what we are building in life, within ourselves and in what we are conquering every day.
To love unconditionally is to decide to love the other even if it is not reciprocal. It is giving of you for the high value in which we place the loved one. Being loved in this way heals us, loving in this way edifies us, makes us more mature and with greater spiritual weight. Loving like this transforms lives.
If you have not loved, your life is empty.
The term “ success ” can have different meanings depending on the individual. For some, it will be to have a certain amount of money, glory, prestige, certain material goods. For others, success rhymes with happiness, health, well-being, etc.Success starts inside of you.It is not an accident . It is a skill that anyone can acquire. But you need a strategy , approved techniques to design the contours of your own success.
People who have done brilliantly
If we statistically study the psychological qualities of several people who have had brilliant success in various areas of life, we find that they have to a degree clearly above average the following skills: will , imagination , creative thinking , self-confidence , perseverance , courage , character , enthusiasm , etc.If you read this list again, you will find that these are things that are not taught in any school, in any high school, in any university. Personal development is crucial to success.
And yet, thousands of experiences prove that everyone can acquire these qualities . No, none of this is a gift, none of this is innate: it can be learned, acquired and kept, provided you want to and have a good method .
We all carry success within us . But we only develop it and allow it to reach its fullness if we are in the state of mind that allows it to take shape. This state of mind is obtained by a personal discipline which one imposes oneself.
The very question of evaluating future or past success is revealing of a way of seeing, of a system of values. Nowadays, what characterizes the term success? If it relates more particularly to professional, social and public life, it also includes emotional, private and family life. Whoever succeeds is presented as a fighter, who knew how to highlight and make the best use of his skills and assets. In return, he obtained social recognition and success thanks to his personal qualities: determination, charisma, perseverance. This is the bright vision of success that sometimes makes us forget its counterpart, its shadow from which it is inseparable: the specter of failure looming and makes us fear of missing our life, worse to be a failure!
How is love related to success?
Why though does love heal almost all wounds and drive us right into happiness? I think mostly for two reasons, something I hope to see supported by data some day. First, being loved reduces our fear of the uncertainty in life. Scarcity, loss, pain will happen, but when we are being loved, all those difficulties seem surmountable. In fact, with the right support, difficulties can be viewed as opportunities for growth instead of as terrible monsters lurking in the dark. Second, loving others focuses our mind on something greater than our little Egos. Love brings out the best in us. Who’s been known to rise to the occasion and act nobly when thinking of oneself? We become creative inventers, noble knights and heroines when we dare to care for someone else but us.
So love is it. What’s left to do is nothing short of engaging in a life-long learning process about how to form and maintain relationships. And don’t forget that love comes in many colors. You might love a partner, gay or straight, your kids, your neighbors, your community, your dogs or your goldfish. Just love. And if you do not quite know how, there are ways to learn it still, step by step, kiss by kiss, and breath by breath.
Self love act as one of the catalyst to motivate the state of mind leading to success. People love to work with people who show them love and care about them. By showing affections to others ,it is possible to win over them and once you does,the platform for success has been laid already.
Personal development is crucial to success and only a happy man gives his best.
Love is the positive force of life.it brings with itself all the things you want from life.so love your life,live your life and you will definitely attain success.
Here is a small story which will definitely prove the power of love.
A woman came out of her house and saw three old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard.she did not recognize them. She said, “I don’t think I know you,but you must be hungry.please Come in and have something to eat.”
“Is the man of the house home?” They asked.”no”,she said.”he’s out.”
“Then we cannot come in”,they replied.in the evening when her husband came home she told him what had happened.” Go tell them i am home and Invite them in,”he said.the woman went out and invited the man in.”we do not go into a house together,”they replied.”why is that? “She wanted to know.one of the old men explained:” he name is wealth he said pointing to another one,”he is success, and I am love.”the he added,”now go in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home. “
The woman went in and told her husband what was said.her husband was overjoyed.”how nice! “He said.” Since that is the case,let us invite wealth! “
His wife disagreed. “My dear,why don’t we invite success?” Their daughter in-law was listening from the other corner of the house.she jumped in with her own suggestion.”would it not be better to invite love?our home will then be filled with love! “
“Let us heed our daughter in-law’s advice,” said the husband to his wife.”go out and invite love to be our guest.”
The woman went out ànd asked the three old men,”which one of you is love?please come in and be our guest. “Love got up and started walking toward the house.the other two also got up and followed him.
Surprised,the lady asked wealth and success ” only invite love,why are you coming in?the old men replied together.”if you had invited wealth or success,the other two of us would’ve stayed out,but since you invited love,wherever he goes,we go with him.WHEREVER THERE IS LOVE,THERE IS WEALTH AND SUCCESS.